1:42 AM

Pursuit of Happiness.

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Have you ever been in one of those situation where you have this sinking feeling of not being headed in the right direction in life, but you go with the flow coz there is no other alternative you can think of? Right now I'm going through one of those phases where nothing looks ok, even though I know it is not as bad as it looks from my perspective. Result -> Bad mood and being unhappy. I've hardly been sleeping or eating and living off coffee. All I do is move around like a sinner waiting for redemption. I've been trying to get out of this grouchy mood for a week now and nothing seems to help. I read an interesting theory on a friend's blog which actually did make sense. Act happy to be happy and you shall be happy. Ingenious idea. But will it really work?

I decided to put the theory to test. I pretended to be happy. It was a lot more difficult that I had expected it to be. But it worked out pretty well. But the pretend happiness was short lived. A few hours into the acting and I started introspecting! BIG mistake. Thinking about what I'm happy about, I started feeling silly and got back to my normal self. But I've still not stopped 'acting' completely. I'm actually getting better at it. The number of hours I can continue acting have increased significantly over the week. But is that the solution? Acting? Where is the end to it? Is there an end at all? Can one be eternally happy?

This reminds me of a dialogue from Pursuit of Happyness : "maybe happiness is something that we can only pursue and maybe we can actually never have it". That sounds about right. You can be happy but cannot stay that way for long neither can you stay sad for long. Life is full of ups and downs; that's what makes it colorful. It totally depends on the individual to strike a balance between the two. Generally ppl focus more on the negatives than positives in life.

However there are many exceptions that I've come across. I have a very close friend, who lives up to his name (inappropriate to take names here) and is happy most of the time. His name could as well have been Happy Singh! We've gone through some bad times together. But there's a huge difference between the way he tackled it and my way of tackling it. I've always admired him for his positive energy. Even though intensities of enthusiasm vary, my energy comes and goes, but his stays. Another one is a lady who's sort of an online friend. Her perspectives are always on the sunny side of things and never on the shadow it casts or maybe I've not seen that side of her. The favourite one is my grandmother. Her zest towards life is far far more than mine. She's over three times my age but still I don't have 1/3 the energy she has! She has her own problems but rarely has a frown on her face. Sometimes I envy these kind of people.

What is happiness really? If one takes a scientific look at it, it is just some chemicals released in our brain under elated states of mind or is it the other way round? The question of whether the chemical is the reason for feeling happy or a consequence of being happy still looms at large. In my quest for answers I did some googling on it and found many many interesting articles. One of them caught my attention more than the rest. I also found some teachings of Buddha. The Noble eight fold path seems to be the most logical way to happiness, but the most difficult to follow. Maybe I will try that too.

I know the I'm in a passing phase and by all possibilities I may be feeling on top of the world tomorrow. But since I gave it so much thought tonight, I decided to pen it down. It might come in handy the next time my spirits are in the gallows.

Cheers!


PS: Pursuit of Happyness - the movie bombed big time at the box office...even the imdb rating is far below what it deserves. It's THE career defining movie of Will Smith. The intensity of his acting is just amazing. Ppl generally don't like thought provoking movies I guess. But it still remains one of my favourites. I must have watched it a million times and look forward to a million times more.


2 comments:

Santhosh Mugoor (ಸಂk) said...

buddhanaagalu yaavudaadaru omdu vichaarada bagge baddate irabEko kano.

Ultimate goal most important amta mikkiddannella biTTu hOdavanu avanu.

yochane maaDu neenu buddanaagodu bahaLasulabha !

adb said...

andannU yochne mADde...part-time buddha agaNa weekend ge aMta. But problem identify mAdidmele beDa aMta sumnidini. buddhana kAladalli bEjAn bodhi vrukshagaLiddvu. ivAga yAva vruskha sigodU kashTa. yavdadru lorry keLge kUtu 'enlighten' AgbEkagatte! So idea cancel.